t-shirts:
Without me, it's just awso
Everybody Loves Ramen
The Police Never Think It's as Funny As You Do
Quotes:
"No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too seriously."
- Dave Barry
"The difference between reality and fiction? Fiction has to make sense."
- Tom Clancy
Real Laws
It is against the law in Washington to pretend that your parents are rich.
It's against the law in Iowa to charge people to watch a one-armed pianist perform.
In Florida, widows may not skydive on Sunday afternoons.
It is against the law in Oklahoma to display a hypnotized person in a window.
Bumper stickers:
I do what the bumper stickers tell me to
When life gives you lemons, shut up and eat your lemons
Follow your dreams, except that one where you're at school in your underwear
Pop Culture Anagrams:
Desperate Housewives ... becomes
We are devious she-pets.
Goldilocks and the Three Bears ... becomes
Girl had cereals, then took beds
The Sopranos ... becomes
A Person Shot
[all pulled from Uncle John's Unsinkable Bathroom Reader.]
R World (Ron Davison muses aloud)
Listen, forget about the tote and the mug. I'll up the ante on the donation, as long as I get the Unsinkable Bathroom Reader...
ReplyDelete-What? These are not original material?
ReplyDeleteI seem to have a vague memory of a "kidnapping joke" that the Kennewick Police did not like as much as you did.
Everybody does love ramen!
ReplyDeleteGeorge Bush said that he is saddened to hear about the demise of Lehman brothers. His thoughts at this time go out to their mother as losing one son is hard but losing two is a tragedy.
ReplyDeleteMilena,
ReplyDeleteI'll talk to the folks in the R World promotions department.
Scott,
I thought of exactly that when I put down the quip. I somehow identified with it. (Now that could be an interesting post, no?)
Chesca,
I'm sure that there would be whole swaths of the male college population that would perish if not for ramen.
And that is very clever, about George and the Lehman mother. In the 1940s, Warner Brothers sued the Marx Brothers over their movie, Night in Casablanca, accusing them of plagiarizing the title from Casablanca. The Marx Brothers countersued, accusing Warner Brothers of stealing the term “Brothers.”
On t-shirts:
ReplyDeleteI'll stick with "Wish You Were Beer"
Oh and on bumper stickers:
ReplyDeleteMy favorite is "My other ride is a BIKE"
My favorite t-shirt:
ReplyDelete"I found Jesus. He was behind the couch."