25 October 2010

September Twits

Tweets from September (and yes, I took advantage of the lack of 140 character limit to embellish a few).

1st the tea party protests taxes, then the Spanish protest being unable to retire at 60. After protesting fiscal reality organizers from both countries plan to protest the laws of physics as "too limiting."

I wonder if the progression in modern media will be from communicating long ideas via blog to shorter ideas via twitter to no ideas via graffiti.

The more stressed, the more likely I am to listen to oldies music. Funny thing about that, though is that I don't remember thinking my life was stress-free then.

True story. "I let my 8 yr old name our new baby Luke." "That's a nice name." "Yeah. He's a huge Star Wars fan."

Curious that fall is so much more serious about global warming than summer. Figures. Summer is never serious about anything. 99 Yesterday? Isn’t fall supposed to be cooler?

The avg American is on a computer 3.7 hrs/day. Install a carriage return with resistance of about 5 pounds. Calories day burned would be 147 which is equal to 15 lbs/yr.

Lottery - tax for people bad at math. Tea Party - politics for people mad at math. Cutting taxes AND reducing deficit? Yeah. That'll work.

Cudda been a contender .. instead just contentious.

Zuckerberg donates $100 million to NJ Schools the same week an unflattering movie about him comes out. Great news for film schools who now know they can get grants creating unflattering portraits of billionaires.

biz idea: Design a line of ergonomically correct underwear. I really have no idea what this means but I think it'll be easy to market.

RT @LimericksEcon: 3 statisticians go bird shooting. 1st shoots 20' to the right, 2nd, 20' to the left, 3rd shouts out, "We got it!".

I'm launching a new search engine: giigle. Enter words like rabbi, duck, and cabbage and it finds you jokes using those “ingredients.”

All the big businesses seem to have a facebook page now. I wonder if facebook has a facebook page. And how would you know?

After Meg buys the governor job ($150 mil?), I wonder if everything will become eWhatever. eDucation. eMV. Even San Francisco could become eBay.

Here in California we're soon to run out of license plate digits. I have an idea for that. Start from scratch in a new font.

I wonder if any pastor or priest observed "talk like a pirate day" yesterday or if Glen Lee was the only one.

My new marketing plan: target accidental audiences. My 2 new podcast shows will be "talk of the press" and "meet the nation"

What if we focused on development in schools and the teaching was incidental?

The early prototype of twitter: the personal license plate with its 7 character limit.

The "T" party is doing so well ... I wonder how well the "U" party would do? Or the iParty? Or the LMNOP Party (targeted @ kids).

So this evening, a guy quits rather than pick me up for a rental car. What is with this DC-area conspiracy to keep me off the road?

In case you were wondering, the Baltimore airport has not a single rental car. Not one. How odd is that?

Fans keep complaining about the Charger's loss, but none of them explain how they would have done any better.

Overheard: "It was harsh, dude. I mean, he literally ripped my head off." Figuratively, I don't know what more to add.

10 - 20 years ago, I remember being dismayed when I got a haircut and saw how much of it was dark. Now I'm consoled by that fact.

Promoting obesity: @ Subway, sandwich with 2 cookies is cheaper than a sandwich with 1. I wonder if Jared knows about this.

Another music awards show last night? I have an idea for a grab at ratings: an awards show for awards show. Best monologue, speech, category

Saw "Complete Idiot's Guide to Sex" at Border's. That explains so much.

My economic stimulus plan: random ATM enhancement. Withdraw $100 and you might win $1,000.

Quran-burning pastor says he would settle for "international punch a Muslim" day. Or just punching anyone who seems tolerant of diversity.

Real reason Obama is hesitant to use word "stimulus." Michelle is tired of people talking about her husband's "stimulus package."

Like large print books, how about a wider than normal lane for the elderly, new drivers, and people on cell phones?

As tensions between Christians and Muslims continue to mount, perhaps we could pause to ask ourselves, "What would the Hindoo?"

Accidentally typed dot-om instead of dot-com and found myself @ blank screen with calming music, slipped from info age to meditative moment

Afghanis burn American flag to protest Quran burning. This is progress. Imagine a future where warfare means the competitive destruction of symbols rather than soldiers

Great news day. Fidel Castro says communism doesn't work and David Brooks says that the American Dream doesn't work. That sort of irony works for me.

Maybe it's time I learned to drink coffee. Or fall asleep more easily in a different time zone.

Bifurcation happens more often than people think to mention it. "Way cool," by contrast, happens less often.

Maybe the phrase should be savor the day rather than seize it.

By the time I had found my motivation I had lost the evening.

biz idea: rewrite the Koran as a series of koans to market to Koreans.

Client responsible for translation of help files, etc, reports that they treat "engineering English" as a foreign language to be translated.

TV show idea: Celebrity whisperer. Psychic holds his/her ear to tabloid photos of celebs and tells us what they're thinking or the real state of their relationship.

Saw a guy with a dream catcher hanging from his rearview mirror. I hope those are just day dreams it is catching.

If we're really serious about globalization, couldn't we just put the whole planet in the same time zone?

Story idea. Jedi Clampett: enlightened warrior priest values and lifestyle challenged by sudden wealth after discovering alternative energy

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