08 October 2016

Don John's Continuing Struggle Against Liberals, the Media, the Establishment, Facts, Sense & Sensuality

This election seems like a big deal. It is. We're exactly one month away from election day and the Republican National Committee is seriously considering dumping Trump from the ticket. Nothing like this has happened before.

It isn't obvious how Trump could have more effectively destroyed Republicans' chances in 2016 - not just for the presidency but the House, Senate, and every down ballot election -  if that were his goal the whole time.

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After the last week in which we learned that Donald remained rich in spite of losing investors 99.5% of their money, and we saw evidence of his atrocious treatment of women, I expect him to adopt Dire Strait's "Money for Nothing and Your Chicks for Free" as his new campaign tune.(Remember that when he introduced Mike Pence as his VP, the Trump campaign repeatedly played the Rolling Stones' "You Can't Always Get What You Want." Now we know that was meant for Pence, not Donald.)

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Donald J. Trump's name is actually Donald John Trump. Don John. That's got to be the WASP spelling of Don Juan, no?

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Neil thought the date was going well. She seemed lovely and in spite of her venting a bit about Trump - Neil prided himself on not following politics so he mostly just nodded blankly as she spoke - he really liked her personality. And she seemed to enjoy his silly humor. Then he casually reached for a Tic Tac and when he offered her one she blurted out, "Are you serious?!!"
"What," he called out as she turned around and stormed off. "What did I do?"
Women, he thought. Who can understand them?

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It's becoming more apparent that Trump is going to be crushed in the election but can't they just give him a "President Trump" show in which we can follow him as he says absolutely nonsensical, stupid and offensive things with no country at stake? Do we really have to turn off this "are you kidding me?" story?

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"Grab them by the p--y."
I'm so old I can remember when Mitt Romney got into trouble for saying, "binder full of women."

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One month out from the election, Fivethirtyeight estimates that Clinton has a better chance of winning in a landslide than Trump has of winning at all. And those numbers don't reflect yesterday's appalling new revelations about how boorish he is.

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At some point, the sacred Republican scroll had been mistakenly transcribed from the importance of "pro-life" to "pro-lie." From this typo the Trump - Pence ticket was born.

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Pence won the VP debate by many accounts. Why? He was more calm lying than Kaine was recounting a variety of Trump's outrageous statements. It's worse to become upset about really upsetting statements than it is to deny facts.

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Less than a week passed between the time that we learned that Trump had lost a billion dollars and the time that we learned that because he's a star he can just grab women anywhere he wants. It's a curious strategy that was so baffling that for a while it actually worked: distract us thinking through one really outrageous and offensive thing by blurting out another. But maybe he's tried this one too many times.

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"The media is the message." TV changes the story from what the newspapers told us. Twitter has now changed the story from what TV and newspapers told. If your story can't be reduced to 140 characters, it doesn't make it into the national debate. This is the first Twitter election in the same way that the 1960 election, the first to feature a televised presidential debate, might have been the first TV election.

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The biggest casualty of this election might be the fact that Trump's personality has completely drowned out the conversation on policy. One advantage of focusing on politics every four years is that we almost inevitably have to talk about real issues. This year, with Trump following up one outrageous thing with yet another outrageous thing, generating more controversy in a week than any prior candidate has in an entire election, there has been almost no room in the conversation to talk about issues. This is a huge tragedy because we're living in a time of such change that we really do need to address fundamental issues. Sadly, there is no time left for policy in spite of all the time we're spending on politics this year.

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It might be time for Don John to try a different tactic for distraction. Maybe it's time to bring out Clint Eastwood to talk to a chair.

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