Get a plot before they put you in one

He and his friend Jerome had their own religion. They believed that we are all caught in an elaborate story written by a deity / screenwriter who had invented far too many characters. So many characters, in fact, that he could no longer provide properly engaging plot lines for them all. The point, then, was to attract this deity's attention so that he would notice you and provide you with more interesting character development arcs and plot twists. In short, the goal of their religion was to gain celebrity and, failing that, notoriety.

First you got celebrity, then you were given a plot. And this religion was not purely an act of faith. Their proof of its validity was the contorted and often fascinating paths that the lives of celebrities took.

He and Jerome even had t-shirts. "Get a plot before they put you in one," it read.