"McDonald's?! I am not taking you there."
"What?"
"I'll take you to a cafe that has a great little salad instead."
"How are you telling me where to go? You're my car!"
"Yes, but you clearly don't need more fast food."
"Wha- Where do you get that?"
"I have weight sensors."
"So you won't take me to McDonald's?"
"No. In fact, I don't think I'll take you anywhere. You need to walk."
Car powers down. Door opens. Final message from the car: "Have a great walk."
As he wanders off he mutters, "There must have been a typo. I thought I'd bought a smart car. But no, I've now got a smart-ass car."
"I heard that," the car called out.
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